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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24890773">this side of me (that only you know)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/98VERNON/pseuds/98VERNON'>98VERNON</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SEVENTEEN (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>All of seventeen are switches until proven otherwise, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dom/sub Undertones, First Times, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, Implied everyone/everyone - Freeform, M/M, Pining, Slow Burn, Smut, a whole lot of fucking</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 01:20:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,609</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24890773</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/98VERNON/pseuds/98VERNON</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>soonyoung helps chan with his frequent boners. much to his dismay, it quickly becomes much more than that.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Chwe Hansol | Vernon/Xu Ming Hao | The8, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Chan | Dino</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>123</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. shhh, keep it quiet.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>please read all the tags first. this au is my baby and i really worked hard on her, i will be updating frequently so if you enjoy this please leave me kudos, comments, or come say hi to me on cc!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>chan is used to getting off in the bathrooms, always making sure the door is locked before quickly undressing and getting in the shower. his late night sessions never last long but he thinks it could be worse, at least he gets the privilege to jerk off every once in a while. the point is, man doesn’t have much experience.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>practice ended early this particular night, and chan also just so happens to have a straining erection which he attempts to hide with his long t-shirt as they head back to the dorms. on the way home, josh is sitting in the passenger‘s seat while hansol quickly gets himself comfortable and ends up falling asleep in the backseat. chan is sitting next to soonyoung as their manager drives them home and around 10 minutes into the drive is when chan realizes he’s made a mistake. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>now, soonyoung is known to be a touchy person and typically chan would just indulge in his love for skinship. however, right now soonyoung’s hand is on his bare thigh, his shorts hiked up just a tad to be exposing more than enough skin. chan immediately freezes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>oh god please don’t notice please don’t notice please </span>
  </em>
  <span>chan repeats in his head thinking of anything to distract him from wanting to relieve the issue at the bulge of his pants. luckily, (or maybe not) soonyoung is too tired and too out if it to be aware of chan’s situation and just trails his hand up higher until it’s gripping the latter’s inner thigh. soonyoung leans in to chan resting much of his weight on the poor boy putting pressure exactly where he needs it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>needless to say, chan’s attempts to soften his dick go unsuccessful. instead what he does is moan quietly which soonyoung just manages to brush off as a simple act of exhaustion. he doesn’t necessarily feel the tension in chan’s body until he rubs soft circles into his inner thigh, (which started off as a sign of adoration and comfort) but was surprisingly met with the younger boy bucking his hips up, clearing trying to achieve some sort of friction. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>even in the barely lit car soonyoung can see the not so light dust of pink that stains chan’s cheeks followed by a whimper of embarrassment. he hopes to god the others in the car didn’t notice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>soonyoung looks down and clear as day, is chan’s clothed member asking, wanting, needing to be touched. needing release. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i-i’m sorry hyung, i don’t even know what came over me. oh god this is so embarrass-” chan starts, but soonyoung just interrupts him giving him a dark, but yet still gentle stare. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“don’t worry about it. happens to everyone. seriously, it’s just the human body, don’t get worked up about it.” soonyoung says and just when chan thinks that’s the end of it, he feels the ghost of finger tips climb further up his leg until it’s lightly squeezing the bulge in his pants. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>soonyoung then leans fully into chan, pecking his shoulder before whispering in his ear, “is this okay baby?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>chan freezes and stammers over his words as he tries to get a coherent, protesting, thought out. “ahh hyung, w-what are you doing- </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> that feels good.” he barely manages to whisper out as soon applies even more pressure to his clothed member, smirking slightly to himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“shhh, baby. wouldn’t want to wake hansol and shua up now, would we?” soonyoung says in a domineering tone sending shivers all the way down chan’s body. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“n-no, i’ll be quiet, i’ll be good i p-promise.” chan manages to say without stuttering, but fails miserably and he is so incredibly embarrassed right now but his horny mind is just thinking of another man touching him so intimately, giving him the pleasure he so deeply desires. he’s sex hazed and not thinking of the potential shift that could occur in him and his hyung’s relationship after this. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“that’s right baby. are you gonna be my good little boy? a good little pup, just for me? how about you rut against my hand until you come in your pants? does that sound good?” and all chan can think is </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck, </span>
  </em>
  <span>where in the world did </span>
  <em>
    <span>his </span>
  </em>
  <span>hyung learn to talk like this. he moans the loudest he has since this started, nodding aggressively while pathetically rutting against the palm of soonyoung hands through his tight little gym shorts. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>his breathing staggers and he looks around frantically to josh and vernon, who are still sleeping soundly. there’s only around five more minutes until they should be arriving home but chan knows that if they continue doing this he will come before then. he looks over to see soonyoung unfazed, right then he turns to meet chan and whisper little praises in his ear. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“aw look at you. so hard and needy and aching baby i bet you are about to come just from this, huh?” he proceeds to bite chan’s ear giving it slow kisses and licks all around the erogenous zone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>please, </span>
  </em>
  <span>soonyoung. fuck </span>
  <em>
    <span>please,</span>
  </em>
  <span> please please.” chan thrusts up to meet soonyoung’s hand even more erratically and all he can think is, </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretty, pretty pretty. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he doesn’t hesitate to tell him how cute and fuckable chan looks right now. chan mewls, looking so hot and bothered and </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>desperately on the edge. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“please </span>
  <em>
    <span>what, </span>
  </em>
  <span>baby? what is it that you want? be a good boy and tell me what you want so i can give it to you.” soonyoung travels his slow biting and kissing from his ear down to the smaller boys collarbones, enough to feel it but nowhere near strong enough to leave marks. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>please</span>
  </em>
  <span>, i want to cum. please, ive been good i just want to cum soonyoung. </span>
  <em>
    <span>please please.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>at this point, chan doesn’t even register that he’s begging for his band member to grant him his release, to grant him </span>
  <em>
    <span>permission. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“well, with little begs like that i don’t see why not. go ahead, cum for me baby.” and</span>
  <em>
    <span> god </span>
  </em>
  <span>chan doesn’t need to be told twice. with two more thrusts he is cumming, whimpering quietly, shaking, and soiling his boxers through to his shorts. soonyoung removes his hand from in between the maknae’s legs. he smiles as he sees the very obvious cum stain on his shorts meanwhile chan looks out the window as he registered what just happened. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>what just </span>
  <em>
    <span>happened</span>
  </em>
  <span> was he used his hyung’s hand, someone who he’s basically known since he was in diapers, to get off. and he </span>
  <em>
    <span>liked </span>
  </em>
  <span>it. this was his first sexual experience that didn’t include his own hand and porn in the mix. involving someone who he deemed to be close enough to call family. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>before guilt can sink in, soonyoung is laying his head on the younger’s shoulder and subtly links their fingers together. all chan can feel is </span>
  <em>
    <span>warm</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but that doesn’t stop his mind from replaying the previous moments. that’s when another daunting realization hits him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he </span>
  <em>
    <span>begged </span>
  </em>
  <span>for his release. he was so incredibly submissive and he knows he would have been willing to take anything that soonyoung gave him in that moment. sure, he’s used to being babied by the fans and other members, but he never saw himself that way. his cheeks burn as he sighs, seriously not believing what just happened. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>chan’s eyes focus on their fingers, still linked and he takes his other hand and rubs his pads gently over the top of soonyoung’s, rubbing light circles. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>soonyoung hums with satisfaction at the light touch and purely innocent affection, quite contrary to what just happened minutes before. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>they pull up to the dorms soon and as chan is brushing his teeth that night, josh stares at him through the doorway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“next time at least </span>
  <em>
    <span>try </span>
  </em>
  <span>to be more discreet. i don’t care what the fuck y’all do just as long as i don’t hear it.” and then he walks off, sighing and shaking his head as he heads into his room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>chan can barely look at himself in the mirror with how embarrassed he is.</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. oh, to be the one you love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>chan slips into subspace, he is so far gone and soonyoung is there to care for him.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi! here’s chapter 2 , i really really hope you guys like it. there’s a sort of angsty verkwan moment there at the end (not too bad, i promise) i really didn’t know where i was going with side ships but something about hansol pining over seungkwan just sits right with me. enjoy :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>chan can’t stop thinking of him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>it’s all that encompasses his mind at this point, like all he knows is soonyoung. a never ending mantra that replays in his head as images of their fun in the car flash behind his eyelids. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>which is how he finds himself in the shower, hot water splashing all over his sore body. he is the last one to shower back at the dorms and seeing as he’s alone and everyone’s asleep, his fingers begin to lightly trail all over his body, worshipping himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>chan is relatively small in build, slight back and arm muscles building throughout the years. his stomach is soft, with barely any definition despite his long experience in training. his ass has the nicest curve to it (or so he hears- maybe feels, from all the members slapping his ass too much) and boy let’s not talk about his thighs. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>his thighs are tan, soft yet rigid with tons of muscle, and are always- </span>
  <em>
    <span>always </span>
  </em>
  <span>exposed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>no matter what he’s wearing, his thighs always somehow manage to peak through. whether it be short gym shorts, what should be baggy sweatpants, or skinny jeans, his thighs are always on display. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>soonyoung </span>
  <em>
    <span>loves </span>
  </em>
  <span>it, and doesn’t hesitate to comment on them often. so, as chan’s hands reach downward to massage his own thigh all he can think of is soonyoung. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he wonders if soonyoung feels it too. an undeniable tension in their relationship since the “incident.” the way their eyes linger all over each other’s bodies, way too much to be considered normal. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>and </span>
  <em>
    <span>god </span>
  </em>
  <span>does soonyoung raise the bar with the skin ship. hugging chan from behind, hands gripping his waist harshly, all played off by a huge smile on his face not to seem suspicious. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>but chan feels it. he feels the tension. he feels a switch in their relationship dynamic. so you really can’t blame him as his hands wrap around his semi-hard length and all he’s picturing is soonyoung </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>specifically, what it would feel like to do things with soonyoung. to have soonyoung do things</span>
  <em>
    <span> to </span>
  </em>
  <span>him</span>
  <em>
    <span>. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he’s seen more than enough porn to have an idea of what he likes in bed. he imagines sucking soonyoung’s cock, but being so slow and sloppy that soonyoung gets impatient and completely destroys his mouth. the hand on his shaft just moves faster now at full hardness. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he thinks of soonyoung slowly preparing him, not wanting chan to be too uncomfortable during his first time. he thinks of how strangely good soonyoung’s fingers would feel slowly scissoring his virgin hole open. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>and then chan’s legs start shaking, so close yet not nearly close enough. he sucks on his fingers until they are soaked from spit and slowly reaches a hand behind him, tracing his rim before pushing the tip of his middle finger in. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>his back arches and he moans out because </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> this is weird, it slightly hurts, and it is so unbelievably tight even for his tiny fingers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>slowly, he builds a rhythm of fucking his finger in and out and it doesn’t necessarily feel good but it’s more of chasing the feeling of being </span>
  <em>
    <span>full</span>
  </em>
  <span>. the hand on his cock speeds up even faster and he’s on the brink of his orgasm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he tries his best to keep quiet but fails and this whole time he’s been letting out little whimpers and soft sighs. when he pictures soonyoung fucking into him, hard, rough and fast, he cums the hardest he has in his whole 21 years of life. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, soonyoung.” one finger is still in his hole as he paints the walls of the shower with ropes of white, repeating soonyoung’s name quietly to himself as his thighs shake and he tries to regain any form of balance. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he proceeds to wash his hair, shampooing the locks gently, his mind still in the headspace he was just a few minutes ago when he came. as he washes and rinses his body, he thinks he could really go for some cuddles right now, wanting to be treated gently and with care, like he’s the </span>
  <em>
    <span>most</span>
  </em>
  <span> precious thing in the universe. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he steps out of the shower with a towel around his waist and heads into his shared room with seungkwan and jun, who seem to be soundly asleep. he throws on a largely oversized hoodie from his dresser and some boxers before tiptoeing to his bed, and then he changes his mind. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he heads down the hall to soonyoung and hansol’s room, knocking on the door and when he receives a muffled “come in” he slowly slips inside. vernon is asleep but soonyoung is scrolling through his phone on his bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“what are you doing up so late? you worked so hard in practice today you should be getting some sleep, chan.” soonyoung pats the spot on his sheets right next to him and gives chan an airy smile. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hyung, i just got out of the shower let me be.” chan whines while proceeding to get under the covers and make himself comfortable. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>there’s a silence as soonyoung barely pays any mind to the small boy next to him, then he reaches over and runs his fingers through chan’s still semi-wet hair. he decides 3am is late enough, puts his phone on the charger before directing his attention completely to chan, hands cupping his face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“are you okay, baby?” soonyoung asks, he notices the youngest member’s demeanor more soft, gentle and almost glass-like, then usual. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>the name has chan’s cheeks burning and he seriously hopes soonyoung can’t feel it under his palm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“m fine hyung. just really tired, that’s all. can we cuddle?” chan musters up his last bit of courage to ask soonyoung the question before he chickens out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“of course, baby. turn around and i’ll be the big spoon.” and chan obeys, sighing once his hyung’s arms wrap around his waist and his fingers start carding through his hair lovingly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>chan’s behavior is so cute right now, soonyoung almost coos but decides against it, instead slowly shutting his eyes and attempting to let sleep take over him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>but the small boy who’s in his arms is also the boy who was moaning his name out not even half an hour before. and he knew, the walls in the dorm being the exact opposite of sound proof. he thinks maybe that justifies why he’s acting so clingy right now, he’d had just come off as so <em>subby.</em> of course, he’s seen it happen before with his previous sexual partners, soonyoung had always been there to care for them after a particularly rough scene.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span> he tries not to think of what chan would feel like around his length, how pliant and absolutely needy he would be at his own hands. he tries not to think of the face chan would make as he’s getting railed into from behind, crying, shaking, begging for release. how well he would take care of chan after having sex. how incredibly loved he would make chan feel.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he listens to chan’s breathing and as it gets slower, he leans over to kiss the back of the maknae’s head and decides against all his horny thoughts. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>now all that’s in his mind is how sweet and kind the younger boy is. how hard he tries and how much he wants to please others. the fact that fuck, he has one of the most pure souls he’s ever met and deserves the whole world. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>and soonyoung doesn’t remember this but that night, he thinks that maybe, just </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he might be willing to give him the world. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>actually, deep down he knows he would. knows that all lee jung chan had to do was ask, and he’d gladly gift him this whole </span>
  <em>
    <span>universe</span>
  </em>
  <span> and wouldn’t expect anything in return. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>too bad he doesn’t remember. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>——————</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>the next morning hansol wakes up and looks over to see the boys cuddling in soonyoung’s bed,</span>
  <span>both snoring lightly and he honestly finds it endearing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he snaps a picture of them and sends it to their 13-member group chat hoping soonyoung won’t kill him when he wakes up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>they don’t have a schedule today so he gets up and locks the door behind him, letting the exhausted boys rest alone in privacy. he hopes the other members aren’t awake yet as he eases into seungkwan’s room, lying down in his bed. seungkwan stirs in his sleep before slowly waking up to meet hansol’s loving eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“what are you doing hansol? go to bed.” seungkwan says in a groggy voice, still half asleep. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“just wanted to see you.” hansol says, his lips curving into a small smile. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you, chwe hansol, are the cheesiest person i’ve ever met. i’m going back to sleep.” seungkwan replies sassily, but not before reaching over and draping himself all over hansol’s body, seeking warmth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>sometimes, when they are in a position like this, hansol can pretend they are something more. he can pretend that the person that knows him best in this world loves him just as much. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>hansol feels his heart wrench knowing this is just a simple act of affection, something that seungkwan does with everyone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>but that doesn’t stop it from hurting just as bad. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>see! it wasn’t too bad, i hope hahaha please leave me comments, kudos, and show this work some love if you like it because it really just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :-)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. i just want it simple</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi, this chapter is inspired by simple (seventeen) and i need somebody (day6) (you will see why soon) i took so much longer to upload then i expected. this chapter isn’t proofread but i tried my best and i hope you like it! also TRIGGER WARNING, depressive thoughts, very very light mentions of alcohol, it’s not too bad but if it makes you uncomfy then skip the ending!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>soonyoung wakes up to chan quite literally on top of him, the smaller boy’s head judged in the crook of his neck. soonyoung figures it must be around noon, and he strokes the back of his head hoping the movement can wake chan up. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“chan, come on dude get up. it’s late, we slept in way too much.” soonyoung says quietly, more gently than he would’ve normally. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan groans in his sleep and rolls over to his designated spot in the bed, but just wraps the comforter all around him in the process. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“chan, do not make me wrestle you right now. i </span>
  <em>
    <span>will </span>
  </em>
  <span>crush you.” soonyoung says jokingly while jabbing the boys side through the covers.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>and chan has never been a morning person, so when soonyoung doesn’t receive a response, he’s not surprised. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he begins his attack by straddling the figure next to him, trying to unwrap the covers to expose chan’s face. chan, groggily, tries to push soonyoung off of him, which is successful but also unravels the comforter in the process. he just sighs, and before he has time to think, soonyoung is back on top of him straddling his hips. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he begins tickling the younger boy all over, until he is giggling and thrashing about underneath him. chan’s hands fly to soonyoung’s hips attempting to sit up in hopes that it’ll prevent him from being attacked even more, but then he becomes painfully aware of their situation. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>his hyung is straddling him, his ass right on top of his crotch. chan’s own arms have found their way around soonyoung’s waist, looped around him loosely. soonyoung then throws his arms around chan’s shoulders and looks at him intently. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“are you awake now?” asks soonyoung, a smirk on his face, never breaking eye contact with chan. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>and much to his surprise, chan leans in to press a kiss on his mouth, it lasts less than five seconds when he breaks it off. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“i’m sorry, you just looked so-” soonyoung cuts him off with a kiss slightly longer than the first one. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“you talk too much sometimes. maybe focus on just feeling.” soonyoung says as he puts his right hand on chan’s cheek, bringing him in for another kiss, this time initiating movement. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan swears that he’s never felt better, until soonyoung grinds down on his lap and moans, breaking their kiss once again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan hasn’t been paying attention but he knows he’s probably been hard this whole time. he only feels it aching and tight in his boxers once soonyoung starts moving his hips slowly, creating friction between their clothed crotches. with his hands on soonyoung’s hips, he guides him to grind down even faster, trying to get both of them to their peak. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan moans probably too loud, the other members probably heard, but that’s not what he cares about right now. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>soonyoung begins panting while frantically rubbing against the youngest member, secretly wishing they weren’t clothed right now. chan’s infrequent moans quickly became frequent mid-pitch whines, which were far too loud for soonyoung’s liking. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>it’s not that soonyoung was afraid of himself being caught by other members, (he's had his fair share of hookups and lazy blowjobs with at </span>
  <em>
    <span>least</span>
  </em>
  <span> half the group.) he just doesn’t want what he has with chan to be questioned. what they had was new and it was far from complicated, at least for now. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>so, he silences chan’s sounds with his mouth, repeatedly kissing the boy under him for at least a couple more minutes. they only separate when soonyoung moans, a soft and tender sound. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“s-so good for me, chan. are you gonna cum soon?” soonyoung asks, pressing their foreheads together without ceasing his rapid movements that travel farther down his body. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan whines again, this time much higher in pitch, before he responds to soonyoung. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“m so close hyung, you feel so good.” chan manages to speak out with a far from stable voice. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“cum with me baby.” soonyoung basically sighs out. chan’s breath becomes so ragged and soonyoung can feel him buck up even harder, within a couple seconds they are both moaning and creaming their boxers. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>they are both almost hyperventilating at this point, and chan looks at soonyoung with hooded eyes and the same gaze soonyoung has seen once before. one of pure pleasure, bliss, and being absolutely fucked-out. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>soonyoung presses a kiss once to his forehead, then to one of his temples, and then back to his lips which he hopes to god he can get used to. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan travels his hands from his hips to soonyoung’s thighs, when he becomes uncomfortably aware of the sticky substance in his pants. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“what is this, soonyoung?” chan asks, his voice still endearing despite the particular heaviness encircling the room. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“this? us?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan nods, soonyoung swallows dryly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“you needed help, i just happened to be there. i wanted to make you feel good. simple, really.” chan hums in thought at soonyoung’s reply. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“simple, huh.” chan wonders what this feeling he has deep in the pit of his stomach is, but he decides not to well on it. “let’s go clean up separately and head out for breakfast, the others are probably all up by now.”</span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>that morning, while chan is eating eggs and bacon mingyu oh so kindly made, he has many unsettling thoughts but one of them is more of an inkling. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>deep down, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew </span>
  </em>
  <span>he and soonyoung were always going to be far from simple. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>__________</span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>it’s no secret that the members of seventeen hook up with each other a </span>
  <em>
    <span>lot. </span>
  </em>
  <span>they have since debut, usually only fooling around with members of their own age, nothing ever too serious. how else are you supposed to deal with your hard-ons without getting into a massive scandal?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>that’s how 95-line got into their not so secretive “relationship.” it mainly consisted of only fucking each other’s brains out and the very forward skinship, in and outside of the dorms. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>in the middle of the night, it’s common to be woken up by moaning, usually from seungcheol’s shared room with jeonghan and josh. sometimes it’s different members from miscellaneous rooms, but it’s really nothing new to any of them. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>and despite knowing it’s nothing new, hansol finds himself on a park bench at three in the morning, crying and sniffling. he can’t erase the memory of it from his mind. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>that night he got home late from hanging out with kino, having a couple beers and just trying to get their minds off of work for once. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>when he unlocks the door to the dorm, he hears the very loud, very obvious sounds of skin slapping against each other. he figures it’s seungcheol, jeonghan, and shua again, so he shrugs it off and inwardly gags before taking his shoes off the door. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he walks by mingyu’s door and thinks the moaning this time sounds different, the voice oddly familiar, and then he hears it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“g-gyu, harder! fuck me harder!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>the sound of a slap and another loud moan. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“fuck, seungkwan your hole is so tight around me. you take my cock so well.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>mingyu groaning. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>hole was made for my cock, right kwannie?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>more skin slapping. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“a-all yours gyu. god i’m close! please gyu.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>seungkwan babbling. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“you’ve been such a good boy, cum for me, baby.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>another loud moan and panting. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>hansol hears it loud and clear, and despite the alcohol that’s running through his system, it still stings. he slips on his shoes and runs back out into the night, not even knowing where he wants to go. he just wants to </span>
  <em>
    <span>leave. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he wants to go somewhere where it doesn’t hurt. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>that’s how he finds himself crying on a small park bench, who knows where in seoul. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>hansol has never been someone to voice out his worries, his inner thoughts, the demons that eat him alive at night. he wishes he could be brave enough to do so, but he’s not. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he feels </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> alone. the only person who makes him feel otherwise is seungkwan, who also just so happens to be the root of his many problems. quite frankly, he doesn’t feel enough. he doesn’t feel like he’ll ever be worthy of love, especially not from seungkwan. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he heard the way seungkwan was falling apart at the hands of mingyu. he’s jealous, but more so accepting. he knows he’ll never mean anything more than a friend to seungkwan. he knows he’s nothing compared to him. he’ll never be as handsome, as tall, as built, as talented, or as loving as kim mingyu. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he feels like nothing right now, and he </span>
  <em>
    <span>needs </span>
  </em>
  <span>someone. he needs someone to hug him, listen to him, and just be there for him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>but sometimes, even that is too much to ask for.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>please don’t kill me for the angst -.- with vernon and seungkwan’s relationship i really didn’t know where it was going but i quite like it now. what fictional vernon is feeling is something that’s raw and real, something so many of us are going through. it hurts, but it’s so so so realistic. remember guys, comparison is the thief of happiness. i hope you enjoyed nonetheless and once again, give comments, kudos, yell at me, i appreciate all of it so much :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. forgetting and feeling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>vernon just wants to be loved. and love he gets, in the form of his ass being pounded into oblivion</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>just to be clear, here are the way roommates are set up </p><p>room 1: seungcheol, jeonghan, joshua<br/>room 2: mingyu<br/>room 3: hansol, soonyoung<br/>room 4: jun, dino, seungkwan<br/>room 5: hao, wonwoo<br/>room 6: jihoon, seokmin</p><p>now let’s pretend this is a big ass dorm :) also this is not proofread pls bare with me and read this intense verhao chapter with soonchan undertones</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>hansol finds himself stumbling through the doors of the dorm for the second time that night, this time it’s around 2 in the morning. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he’d gotten a few more beers and just a tad bit more drunk while he was on his way home. his phone had been dead for a couple hours and he sincerely hopes no one important was trying to contact him, but then again it’s the middle of the night and </span>
  <em>
    <span>who cares? </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>his heart drops when he sees minghao sitting on the couch, looking slightly distressed and also like he just woke up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hao-” hansol starts but doesn’t get the chance to finish. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“where were you? god, you had me worried sick. i literally was seconds away from waking everyone in this house up to go look for you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i was out with kino. i’m a little tipsy.” hansol giggles and slurs making his way over to the couch with the older male. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hansol, i heard you come home earlier and then leave not even 5 minutes later. what happened?” minghao isn’t stupid, the only reason he heard hansol enter was because seungkwan and mingyu’s escapades were keeping him up as well. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“nothing, nothing.” he plops himself on minghao’s lap and wraps himself all around the boy, leaving the elder confused. he knows hansol is more than just a little tipsy, he only gets this affectionate when drunk and he only gets drunk to drown out his feelings, which half the time doesn’t work and only makes him feel things even more. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“this is about seungkwan, isn’t it?” he brushes the hair out of the younger’s eyes. he swears he can see hansol’s eyes well up with tears despite it being almost pitch black in the living room, the moonlight barely peeking through their curtains. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“h-how’d you know?” tears fall from his eyes. he immediately is filled with a rush of embarrassment. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“he wasn’t exactly quiet earlier...and just because he is oblivious doesn’t mean i am. i see everything, hansol.” minghao gently wipes away the three tears that have fallen down his cheeks, studying the latter’s face intently. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“it hurts, hyung. i want to be enough for him.” he sniffles, and takes a deep breath while preparing to get off the mullet-haired boys lap. “i-i shouldn’t be unloading this on you. i’m sorry i’m a mess. i’m sorry hao, i’ll just go lay down now, it’s late.” he feels an iron grip on his waist as soon as the words leave his mouth. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“vernon, stop. i know you, you close yourself off, and get too into your head. you have got to stop doing that, baby. you </span>
  <em>
    <span>are </span>
  </em>
  <span>enough. you are perfect, and everyone around you sees it. we all love you so much, sollie. you are so so </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> loved. i wish you could see it.” minghao lifts up the sad boy’s hand to his lips and kisses a few knuckles lovingly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i just always feel like there’s going to be someone better.” he begins fiddling with the dancer’s hair, which is getting increasingly longer in the back as the weeks go by. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“there's no one better. just you.” minghao whispers, so quietly vernon almost doesn’t hear it. the older kisses hansol’s neck, soft and light, trailing them up and around the expanse of the region. eventually the kisses reach hansol’s face, traveling all over his cheeks, forehead, and eventually his closed eyelids. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>hansol is never one to have patience, so he cups the chinese’s face and brings him up for a proper kiss. it starts off innocent, a mere brush of skin lasting a few seconds. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao pulls back and looks deeply into vernon’s eyes that the younger boy can almost swear he sees through his </span>
  <em>
    <span>soul. </span>
  </em>
  <span>the moment is intimate, more intimate than the pair have ever been with anyone else. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao originally planned to go back to bed after making sure hansol had come home safe. however, sometimes plans change. and right now, he needed to show the other how much he truly loved him. he knows no matter if the latter is slightly drunk, he still needs this right now. he needs the reassurance, and he inwardly curses himself for not giving it to him earlier. for not giving it to him constantly. before the guilt sets in, he presses into hansol’s lips for a second time that night, and immediately feels reciprocation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he feels the shorter relax into his hold and press even closer into him. they kiss a few more times, nothing too big, just small movements of lips against lips. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>when hansol feels minghao’s tongue swipe over his bottom lip, he sighs and accepts it eagerly. minghao can taste all of him, the soju leaving a bitter taste on his tongue. even if he had been drinking, vernon’s usual taste is still there. sweet, soft, yet so overwhelming at the same time. minghao has made out with him before, plenty of times, and he never gets over how utterly </span>
  <em>
    <span>good </span>
  </em>
  <span>hansol’s mouth is. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he feels himself getting slightly hard at the thought of hansol’s lips around his cock. hansol is always eager to suck dick, he takes it all and always makes sure his partner feels good. he’s so eager to please, to give. minghao bets that vernon would be the type to absolutely melt at having his throat fucked. he pushes all of these ideas out however, this is supposed to be about the younger. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>maybe another time though. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao breaks the kiss to once again litter pecks all over the expanse of the younger’s collarbones and neck, sucking and biting here and there. he knows hickeys would be hard to cover up so he doesn’t stay in one place for too long. hansol tilts his head to the side, giving him more access. he gasps at a particularly rough bite and grinds his hips down. muttering an apology, he embarrassingly hides his face until the other’s neck and gives it a kiss and a lick before lifting minghao’s chin up to meet his in a kiss. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>this time the kiss is so much more eager, sloppy, and filled with a whole lot of tongue. minghao groans into hansol’s mouth. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“are you sure about this? we can just go to bed now if you aren’t up for it.” the older man asks, and vernon slightly whines. he slips his oversized sweater up towards his waist and minghao looks down, seeing the very obvious outline of hansol’s dick straining in his jeans. “i want this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “which room? wonwoo is still sleeping in mine.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“well let’s hope soonyoung is sleeping somewhere else tonight.” they both chuckle as they make their way to hansol and soonyoung’s shared room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>lucky for them, soonyoung is no where to be seen. probably with seokmin or chan is vernon’s guess. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao locks the door behind them and then pins the younger against the door. they begin making out, with hardly any precision or skill, just pure want. hansol’s hands wander all over the chinese’s body, up and down the slightly muscular arms and back, slipping his hands up the other’s shirt to feel his very well defined abdomen. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“how do you want me, sollie?” minghao begins taking his own shirt off. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“um, can you- </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, can you fuck me? please.” hansol asks while minghao rids him of his shirt as well and guides them to their bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“of course baby. anything you want.” minghao starts undoing the belt buckle and slides off the younger’s pants, leaving him in just his boxers. as soon as vernon hits the pillow minghao trails kisses all over his torso, with bites and licks here and there. he makes his way to hansol’s nipples, licking around them softly. his back arches off the bed and minghao can tell he’s doing something right. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“sensitive here, huh?” he takes the bud back into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it and sucking softly while bringing up his other hand to fiddle with the other neglected bud. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>ah, </span>
  </em>
  <span>ah, just-” he hisses at the pleasure. “just a little.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao chuckles at him softly and moves his mouth to the other nipple, this time sucking and biting harshly. vernon moans, deep and at the back of his throat. he cards his fingers through the elder’s hair, encouraging him gently. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he moves his way down hansol’s body, making sure his socks are off before pressing a kiss to his knee, then up his thighs. once he has reached the inner portion of the muscular thighs he starts biting and nipping, making sure they will leave little marks all over. the boy shudders and let’s out sighs here and there. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao concludes that hansol is just sensitive all over. </span>
  <em>
    <span>cute</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he thinks. people are missing out on this. he tries not to think of seungkwan as one of those people. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he straightens up to look at his work on the hansol, his current canvas. he looks breathtaking with love marks all over the pale skin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“sollie, you are so beautiful. so pretty for me like this.” hansol whines and covers his face but spreads his legs impossibly wider, inviting him in. minghao knows about hansol’s notorious degradation kink, but he thinks he’ll use praise and it seems to have worked on the younger by the twitch in his boxers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“can i take these off?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hold on, um, can you undress first? i’m a little shy.” minghao giggles and pecks him on the lips before tossing all his clothes off and to the side. vernon stares at him in awe, he really does have a ridiculously nice body. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you’re so handsome, hyung.” hansol stutters out and continues to roam his gaze all over the latter, basically drooling at the sight. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“thank you, baby. so are you. you ready for these to come off now?” he receives a nod and with that hansol’s boxers off and his cock slapping up against his stomach. minghao runs his nails around his stomach and thighs once again, making hansol shiver before wrapping his fingers around the length. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he moans at the touch, and it’s loud. hansol was known to be talkative in bed, always wanting to show how good his partner is pleasing him, especially when he’s bottoming. everyone knows when hansol is getting fucked at the dorms which is embarrassing enough, so usually he doesn’t hook up with other members. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>right now though, his volume is the least of his worries because minghao’s hand is working hard on his cock. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“such pretty sounds. are you enjoying yourself, baby?” minghao speeds up his pace and vernon nods but bites on the skin of his hand trying to silence himself at this point. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“be a good boy and let me hear you. i want to hear how good i’m making you feel.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i’ll be good. baby is a good boy.” minghao’s cock twitches at hansol referring to himself as baby, because </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck. </span>
  </em>
  <span>vernon is cute, hot, and sexy all at the same time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“is it ok if i suck you off?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>yes, </span>
  </em>
  <span>please hyung.” and that’s all it takes for minghao to open his mouth around the tip of hansol’s pretty cock, licking around the head and slit where he assumes vernon is the most sensitive. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he can tell he’s right by the way vernon tries to restrain himself from bucking up into his mouth and grips on to the sheets harshly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao usually isn’t one to be in love with sucking dick, (unlike jun, he could probably fit two cocks in his mouth with ease) but with hansol it’s different. he wants to show his admiration for the younger. so, he very slowly begins to take the rest of his cock into his mouth which is a challenge, to say the least. he stops about three quarters of the way down the length and slides his hand up and down the rest. he sucks hard and flattens his tongue, trying to swirl it here and there. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>from above, hansol doesn’t stop moaning and groaning. it’s soft but at the same time the sound is consuming. minghao pulls off the leaking cock with a pop. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you have lube in the drawer right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“y-yeah, it’s in the first one over here.” he motions to his nightstand and minghao crawls over to reach into it and pulls the medium sized bottle out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“vanilla? it suits you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“usually i get unscented but vanilla is comforting to me. i don’t know why.” he giggles and minghao can tell by the anticipating look on his face that he’s trying not to come off needy. “cute.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he pours a generous amount of lube on his fingers and takes vernon’s member back into his mouth. he warms up the lube before encircling his fingers around the rim of hansol’s entrance. he slides a finger in slowly and he feels the boy under him start to squirm and moan out a few curses in broken korean. he slides his finger in and out, slowly increasing his pace before sliding in the second finger with ease. he keeps up both the pace of the fingers in hansol as well as his mouth around hansol’s member, trying to prolong the pleasure for the younger boy.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he curls his finger upwards looking for that special spot. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck, fuck, </span>
  </em>
  <span>right there hao. right there!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he repeatedly presses his fingers on the bundle of nerves inside hansol before sliding in a third and he hears the boy whimper, presumably out of discomfort. he bobs his head up and down the length faster after catching his breath for a moment, trying his best to distract him from the pain. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>hansol’s whimpers quickly turn into full blown moans once again, and minghao pulls off of his cock. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“do you want one more? or are you good?” he kisses one of the hickeys he had previously left on his inner thigh. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“yes, it’s been a while since i’ve done this.” another sigh. minghao attempts to slide another finger in the tight rim after pouring some more lube all over his hole and fingers. there’s some resistance, but his whole body is repeatedly asking for more. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>hansol let’s out a feral sound and minghao crawls upwards to kiss him, adding lots of tongue and making it very sloppy, nibbling on his bottom lip often. he curls his fingers in repeatedly, and hansol just groans into his mouth incessantly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hao, i’m gonna cum if you, ah- if you keep g-going.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“then cum, sollie. you don’t have to ask for permission.” he whispers seductively and flicks one of hansol’s nipples before pinching and rubbing it in between his fingers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>vernon chants his name like a mantra. “i’m cumming, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck, holy shit minghao. you’re so good.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>he curses in english, and minghao just smirks as he watches the 21-year-old come undone beneath him. minghao takes it upon himself to lick the other’s stomach and chest clean, loving the way hansol tastes on his tongue despite the foulness of it all. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“do you wanna go any further?” which is code for, </span>
  <em>
    <span>do you think you can cum again? </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“yes, hyung. please, i want this and i’m sure. wanna be a good boy for hyung.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you’re always a good boy for me.” he kisses hansol’s cheek before sliding out his fingers from the younger boy’s hole. hansol instinctively whines and clenches around nothing, hoping for minghao to just put it in already. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“please, hurry up hyung. i need you, i need your cock.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>it’s no news to anyone that hansol is particularly submissive in nature, but minghao has never seen it extend this far in person. he sits there waiting, </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanting </span>
  </em>
  <span>to be ruined. it’s gorgeous, to say the least, and the exhibitionist part of minghao hopes one of the other members can hear how pretty he sounds right now, how it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>him, </span>
  </em>
  <span>that’s ruining the pretty boy under him. he wants everyone to know that hansol is completely and totally his right now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he takes the bottle of lube and fiddles around to find a condom by the nightstand, but is quickly met with protests. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“no condom, hyung. please, i want to feel all of you. i want it raw, please hao.” the desperation in his voice leaks out and minghao just nods, spreading an even amount of lube all over his cock, slicking it up well before giving hansol one last peck and lining himself up with the puffy rim. vernon moans the loudest he has all night once he feels the head of minghao’s cock enter him, followed by the rest of his length agonizingly slow. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao bottoms out and groans. “sollie, you feel so good right now. so tight even after taking four of my fingers.” hansol grabs minghao’s face and pushes him down to meet his lips, mewling into the kiss. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>hansol wraps his legs around minghao, guiding him even deeper into his heat. “you can move now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>the taller boy grips his waist and rocks his hips back and forth slowly, causing vernon to whine as his eyes squeeze shut. minghao develops a steady pace, not too hard, not too fast, he knows hansol might be sensitive after already cumming once. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“minghao, i-i’m going to lose it if you don’t fuck my brains out right now.” minghao smirks, of course hansol would like it rough. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“bratty now, are we?” he continues his thrust pattern for the time being. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i try not to be.” they both giggle but suddenly a switch turns in minghao and he starts fucking into the boy with no mercy, his fingers digging hard into the small waist and all that can be heard is groaning and skin slapping hard against skin. he lifts hansol’s hips just a tad bit higher, searching for a different angle. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>vernon’s back arches off the bed, he moans and swings his head back and mutters out incoherent phrases. his eyes are still squeezed shut and minghao keeps his brutal and relentless pace. his cock stands proudly and neglected on his stomach oozing with precum. he doesn’t dare touch it, he doesn’t know if he’s allowed and right now he wants to be a good boy. good boy’s don’t get punished, they get attention and love. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“fuck, i could breed you just like this. i bet you would love having your little hole filled to the brim with your hyung’s cum.” he slows down, teasingly before pulling all the way out and slamming back in just to receive more moans and babbling coming from the younger. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“mm yes, god </span>
  <em>
    <span>yes. </span>
  </em>
  <span>sollie would love that. wanna feel your cum inside me so bad, hao.” minghao wonders how he could’ve possibly formed a sentence with his current state. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“m g-gonna- i’m gonna cum soon. don’t stop, hyung.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck, </span>
  </em>
  <span>sol you are so gorgeous. so pretty and perfect and taking my cock so well. such a good little pup, i wish you could see yourself like this.” hansol whines, significantly higher pitched then his moans usually are and he can tell that the younger boy is so far gone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you like that? like when i praise you and call you a good pup?” he feels nails scratching his back and suddenly becomes conscious of his hands leaving deep marks on vernon’s waist that he knows will become bruised soon. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>yes yes yes. </span>
  </em>
  <span>i love it. love when hyung tells baby he’s good.” with a particularly rough thrust hansol sends his hand flying down to his cock and squeezing on the base, keeping himself from cumming. good boys don’t cum early. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“wait just a little for me hansol, i’m almost there baby.” and minghao plows into the boy even harder to the point where tears collect in hansol’s eyes. he knows it’s completely out of pleasure and the idea turns him on so much he almost cums right there. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“look up at me, nonie.” he grips the younger boys chin to make eye contact and it’s intimate, loving, completely opposite of what’s going on southward. they both cum after making eye contact and vernon basically screams, trembling all over as minghao moans much louder than he probably has in his whole life. (and he’s been fucked by seungcheol, so that’s saying something) </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he slows down the pace as he fucks both of them through their orgasms, then kisses the boy softly with the perfect amount of tongue and hansol can taste himself from earlier. minghao feels boneless and just lies on top of the boy for a few more seconds, before recollecting himself fully. he slides his length out and looks to see hansol’s hole leaking cum and he almost gets semi-hard from the sight alone. vernon whines at the loss, he already misses minghao inside of him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>the chinese brings his fingers to encircle the rim, immediately met with a hiss from hansol. he admires his work all over the younger boy’s body. his slightly defined abdomen is covered with his own cum, and there’s marks on his sides from being gripped so tightly in the shape of little crescents. his hole is still slightly clenching around nothing, messy with cum. the pale thighs are littered with red marks that will soon turn purple. his face looks blissed out and his hair is messy, looks like he just got ravaged by a beast. (sex beast, to be exact.)</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao moves to get off the bed but vernon just makes grabby hands at him. </span>
  <em>
    <span>clingy after sex, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he figures. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“baby, i’m just gonna get some towels and water so we can get cleaned up and then go to bed. i’ll be back in a second.” hansol pouts, but nods and waits there patiently and he can feel his eyelids getting heavy from how tired he is. his body is exhausted and he knows he’s going to be sore tomorrow, but part of him can’t wait. he’s going to </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel </span>
  </em>
  <span>minghao’s touch on him for the next week, probably. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao comes back with wet washcloths and a glass of water. hansol takes a sip of the cold fluid and minghao immediately begins cleaning him off. it’s gentle, and vernon knows he’s never felt more loved than he does in this moment. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you were so good, hansol. i’m proud of you.” he pecks over the skin he finishes cleaning. once he gets to his hole he realizes that it’s irritated, and he rubs away the cum and lube ever so softly, but hansol still whines the whole time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ah, i’m still sensitive.” minghao finishes wiping the excess away and lightly pats away the sweat on his own body and vernon’s face with a separate towel. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you’re probably gonna be in pain tomorrow. i’m so sorry baby, i should’ve been less rough.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“no no, don’t be sorry. i asked for it. i like it that way. i like seeing the aftermath.” he brings his thighs up to rub over the love marks he was given, and sighs before smiling up at minghao. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you are the cutest. let’s go to bed, love.” he gets up to find another soft blanket in the closet and wrapping the younger and himself in it. they don’t bother getting dressed, it’s way too late and they are both properly exhausted. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“thank you, hao. i seriously needed this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“don’t thank me, hansol. i love you, we all love you. it’s okay to need a little reassurance sometimes.” he kisses hansol on the lips, lingering slightly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i love you too, hyung.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>they fall asleep entangled in each other’s arms. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>the next morning they wake up to seokmin barging into their room, looking for god knows what. minghao startles awake but hansol just groans in his sleep and turns to the other side. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i-” seokmin looks at them and shakes his head as he can clearly tell both of them are naked despite the blankets and covers draped over them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“looks like you guys had fun last night.” he giggles and moves his eyebrows at minghao teasingly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“fuck off. what do you want?” minghao speaks with a bite, his voice hoarse from sleep. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“oh, soonyoung wanted me to get something. i forgot what it was now that i’ve… intruded. thank god i’m a heavy sleeper.” seokmin stands there, dumb and almost clueless expression on his face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“yeah, no shit. i feel sorry for the others though.” minghao giggles and he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knows</span>
  </em>
  <span> that they would’ve all heard hansol screaming and begging for his cock last night. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>seokmin chuckles, “yo hansol?” vernon rolls around and makes sounds in protest before sitting upright. “dude, you guys should probably get up. we have a schedule tonight but it’s like 11 in the morning. we were thinking of going out to lunch in like an hour.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“but do i have to?” hansol whines out the last bit and leans his body completely on to minghao. in the process, the blanket uncovers his naked figure, not completely, but enough to where seokmin sees a lot. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“holy </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit, </span>
  </em>
  <span>vernon you look like you got fucked to the next universe and back.” hansol helps and covers his whole body, ducking under the covers shyly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ya! like you haven’t been in the same state before. </span>
  <em>
    <span>oh soonyoung, harder, make me your cumslut!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>minghao mimics him in a very high pitched voice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>seokmin huffs. “i do </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>sound like that. and i don’t remember the use of the word cumslut.” he shrugs and honestly minghao doesn’t know why he’s still in the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“oh really? because i do. actually that night has me scarred, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck me daddy, yes yes like you mean it! fuuuuck!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>he mimics his tone once again and scrunches his face up in fake-pleasure, copying seokmin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you know what? suck my dick. like you didn’t get off to it that night!” seokmin crosses his arms and looks profoundly offended and hansol just hears the scene and tries not to break out in a fit of giggles </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“yeah i’m not gonna lie, i did. it was pretty hot. what are you still doing in here? get out!” he finds the nearest pillow and chucks it at seokmin’s ass as he runs out the room. once vernon hears the door close again he resurfaces from the mess of blankets. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“good morning.” hansol blushes a shade of pink and can hardly meet minghao’s eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“how are you feeling baby?” minghao turns and rubs the small of his back while giving a peck to the bare shoulder in front of him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“like jelly. i don’t think i’ll be able to get up. carry me to the kitchen please.” he pouts and says in a not so serious tone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ya, you want me to bring you out there when you are literally ass naked? i mean, be my guest, i know i’d like to see it.” hansol fake-shoves him and he looks like a kicked puppy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you pervert.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hey hey, that’s not what you were saying last night.” he is met with a pillow hitting the back of his head and getting tackled. they go into a fit of laughter, hansol attacks him with kisses and minghao lightly tickles him all over. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>in a moment, they stop and stare at each other in silence. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“thanks again, for last night. really, i mean it. that’s the most loved i’ve felt in a while.” minghao squishes his face hard and gives him a fat peck on the lips as a reply and hansol looks offended, wiping off the kiss with the back of his hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“gross.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“again, that’s not what you were saying last night.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ya! when are you going to stop with that? i’m embarrassed.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you secretly like it. i know you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“whatever. let’s get dressed.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>hansol gets up out of his bed and makes his way to the closet, and minghao can’t help but admire just how good his ass looks. he puts on the pair of sweatpants he was wearing last night when hansol came home. no underwear, of course. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i can feel you staring.” hansol laughs and puts on a pair of loose shorts. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you look hot. well, your hair is a bit all over the place, but it’s cute.” he sits back down on vernon’s bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“yeah yeah whatever.” hansol looks smug and walks over to where minghao is, sitting on the bed with his legs dangling on the side. he straddles his lap and they look at each other lovingly. minghao instinctively brings his hands to the latter’s hips and hansol yelps. they both look down and see the bruises hugging hansol’s waist and it’s arousing knowing that minghao is the cause of it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you </span>
  <em>
    <span>do </span>
  </em>
  <span>look like i fucked you into the next universe and back.” minghao chuckles and looks back up at hansol, trailing his hands to grope his ass through the shorts. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“it sure felt like it. hey, stop that, i don’t think my ass can handle a round two.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ugh, fine. i have a request.” hansol gets back up, this time minghao can see the slight falter in his step and the devil in him is secretly proud.  “what is it?” vernon can’t hide the flirtatiousness of his voice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“wear a crop top? or just like a shirt that you’d be able to see.. you know.. the marks i gave you. at least until we have to leave.” this is the first time minghao’s voice doesn’t come out confident in the past 12 hours, he even sounds a little shy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ohhhh. you want </span>
  <em>
    <span>them</span>
  </em>
  <span> to see me like this, don’t you? isn’t that a bit possessive?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you don’t have to, of course. i just think you look really pretty, they should see you like this. and know that i gave them to you.” minghao’s face turns pink at his words, until he sees hansol throw a loose but revealing crop top on. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“how do i look?” hansol makes his way over to the mirror to look at the damage and he can definitely see what minghao is talking about. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he looks </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretty, </span>
  </em>
  <span>and dainty, even porcelain-like. you can barely see the hickeys on his thighs but the bruises on his waist and hips are evident. anyone with a brain would’ve been able to tell what happened to hansol the night prior. the contrast of the marks on his milky skin make it actually, </span>
  <em>
    <span>really attractive</span>
  </em>
  <span>, hansol thinks. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>minghao makes his way over to wear hansol is looking at himself in the full-length mirror. he wraps his arms around the shorter’s waist and puts his chin on vernon’s shoulder. “you look great. and all of </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” his fingers dance over his left side, “is because of me.” he whispers, and hansol turns his face to connect their lips for the nth time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>they break apart a couple minutes later and minghao finds himself shirtless on a kitchen stool, conversing with soonyoung and chan, who’s on the elder boy’s lap. they both look like they took a century long slumber yet everyone still finds it endearing. on the couch is hip hop team plus joshua watching some random show that seungcheol put on from netflix. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>hansol is inconveniently sat between seungcheol and mingyu, squished between the two muscular men. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“someone looks like he had fun last night.” mingyu looks hansol up and down from next to hansol and the younger just rolls his eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“so what if i did? everyone heard you staking your claim on seungkwan last night too.” he doesn’t even think when the words tumble out. the name seungkwan sounds foreign on his tongue and leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>oh, seungkwan. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he hasn’t thought of seungkwan in a while. the thought is painful now that it’s been reintroduced in his mind. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>when he was with minghao, up until just now, he hadn't thought of seungkwan at all. he didn’t feel the heaviness of his feelings for his best friend weighing on him at a constant. he shrugs the feeling and decides he’ll dwell on it later. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>mingyu goes red in the face at hansol’s comment which he honestly didn’t expect from the soft spoken man. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you heard that?” mingyu asks. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“yes. god, i didn’t know tops could be so loud.” chan replies from his seat on soonyoung’s lap. “i mean seungkwan was loud too but jeez, that was ridiculous.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>he shifts his weight to soonyoung’s left thigh and feeds him part of the banana he’s having as breakfast. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>they all turn their attention to the maknae, but he just shrugs and continues alternating feeding him and soonyoung the banana. “i’m going to pretend you didn’t say that and carry on with my day.” joshua replies and grabs his tea before leaving the living area and going into his room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hansol’s a loud top.” wonwoo calls out and vernon just watches the scene unfold in shock. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“he’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span> loud whether he’s taking or giving it, let’s not sugar coat it.” seungcheol replies. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“so is mingyu! why do you guys single me out so much? this is why i hate having sex at the dorms.” hansol huffs and crosses his arms over his chest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“because you get cute and whiny. and embarrassed, ur ears are ridiculously red right now.” minghao says endearingly from a few feet away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ok, but we aren’t gonna talk about the fact that hansol is like… actually hot? i know we were all thinking it.” soonyoung states plainly, and vernon is not having it. “i’m going back to my room. don’t disturb me, ever.” he says as he saunters away, cutely as always. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>at that, chan shifts once again but feels around until soonyoung yelps out of pain. “what was that for?!” he complains while trying not to move or else chan’s ass will really be smashing his balls uncomfortably. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>chan gets close enough to whisper into his ear so that the rest of the group don’t hear. “that, my dear friend, was for calling hansol hot. and i'd do it again.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ok first of all, you think he’s hot too. second of all, am i only allowed to call you hot from now on?” he whispers back. chan chuckles and says in a normal voice, “you said it, not me.” soonyoung doesn’t know which part he’s referring to, but he’ll stop arguing for the time being. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>the rest of the day goes smoothly for all of them, almost </span>
  <em>
    <span>too</span>
  </em>
  <span> smoothly. that’s until there’s a knock on hansol’s door at 1 in the morning. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hansol? can i come in?” the younger recognizes that it’s seungkwan’s voice and his heart falls to his ass as he fills with dread. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“y-yeah.” his voice is unstable. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>seungkwan slides in the room with ease and makes mental note that soonyoung is sleeping on the bed next to hansol’s. they’ll just have to whisper, he thinks. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“what’s up?” vernon asks, staying casual and keeping his usual cooking demeanor with the other boy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“nothing, i just wanted to talk. you weren’t.. avoiding me today, right?” seungkwan sits down on the edge of hansol’s bed, and the latter doesn’t move from his spot. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“why would i?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i don’t know.. maybe because of last night?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“what about it?” hansol can feel the tips of his ears burning and inwardly curses at himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“god, i don’t even know what i’m saying. i just feel like things have been different with us recently.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“things will always be different with us.” he actually wants to kick himself today because his filter seems to have taken a vacation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“what? different how?” seungkwan's voice quivers, there’s no denying it between them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“we’re two different people. we won’t always be compatible and trust me, i found that out the hard way.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“what are you implying hansol?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i don’t know.” vernon throws his phone to the other side of the bed which he has been unconsciously scrolling on this whole time. his attention goes to seungkwan fully. “you know, i’ve spent a good portion of my time chasing after people who’d never want me in the first place.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hansol-ya, what are you talking about? you make no sense.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he smiles, not a genuine one, but one that’s full of disbelief, pain, and a hint of sarcasm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“and that’s exactly what i’m talking about. we just don’t understand each other.” the voice in his head is reminding him of all the times seungkwan has been painfully oblivious to all his actions. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“vernon, i try my </span>
  <em>
    <span>best </span>
  </em>
  <span>to understand you. always. what’s not good enough?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“oh so now you are the one playing the ‘what’s not good enough’ card?” he laughs. “i chase after you seungkwan! </span>
  <em>
    <span>you! </span>
  </em>
  <span>all the god damn time, and somehow i’m the one that’s not good enough. it’s always someone like mingyu. and that’s not just because of what happened yesterday, it’s all the time.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you’re jealous because i fucked mingyu? i fuck a lot of people. all the time. you don’t own me. you have no right to be jealous, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>aren’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>my boyfriend.” their voices are almost significant yells but neither of them are in their right mind to quiet down. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“exactly.” seungkwan sees hansol’s eyes well up with tears which is new, the boy only cries probably once a year. he’s regretful. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“hansol, i-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>there’s a cough from the other side of the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“seungkwan, i think you should go.” it’s soonyoung. they woke him up with their arguing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>usually, he would protest. but his legs carry him out the door with his head hung low, and a pit of guilt in his stomach. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>this vernon-centric chapter is probably everything i’ve wanted to write and more. also this is the longest chapter yet, if you see this let me know if you prefer short + frequent updates or long + spaced out updates. thank you for reading as always &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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